Merry Christmas and Happy New Year 2012 :)

Hello Everyone :)

Its been awhile since i blogged. sorreh :P

Was having fever and sore throat for the pass 4 days.

NOW IM ALL CURED :D weeeeeeeee! ^^

but then the taste of medicine is still in my mouth T.T and i still have to finish the antibiotic. yuckkkk ):
sooo.. all of YOU readers,

GO DRINK WATER NOWWW! xD dont fall sick cuz medicines nowadays are expensive and yucky :P

In 6 more days time,

SCHOOL REOPEN :D

wait.. is that a weeeeeeeeee or noooooooooooooo? :/

im okay with school actually :)

I wanna see my friends xD

Next year would be a great year, right? :)

2012 will be a nice year. ^^

I'll learn to be more confident, more hyper and happy, no more emo emo or sad face :P

Cant wait till next year weih xD

its gonna be a new start :)

I cant wait to see my friends again laaa xD all the talking and hyper-ing after hols :D

and all the homeworks and tuitions,

ko-kurikulums, St john Meeting.. yayyy :D

and... MORNING SESSION :D

No more emotional post. no more sad face. JUST A BIGGGG SMILE EVERYDAY :D

To those who arent happy today,

Dont be sad kay? be happy (: you should be happy when u are reading this cuz it means u are alive. is that a good reason for you to smile? xD

okay i dun think anyone's gonna read this anyway :P

Love you all! xD

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year 2012 :)

and happy school reopen xD

State Cadet Camp 2011

State camp was awesome :P

The friends part only lahh not the course and exams :P

I think im gonna pass Caring of Children only ._.

i Met a lot of friends in SCC. xD so nice :D

and it was a reunion for ACC ppl :P

I met all my ACC friends and i hope to see them next year if possible :D

i met ppl from other Area, Schools and all.

So fun la :D

Sadly i didnt go for Repelling and Flying fox ):

I was really looking forward to flying fox but im afraid of heights :P

but still! if there's flying fox it would be fun!

The first 2 days didnt turned out as i expected..

I was home sick ): i cried at night. both nights ._.

But then 3rd day onwards i was having fun to the max! xD

I'll definitely go for next year's SCC (:

Other SCC friends, SEE YOU ALL NEXT YEAR!

and Area friends, see u guys in ACC if there is ACC xD

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Today is TANG YUAN FESTIVAL :D

for those who dunno whats Tang Yuan,

Its actually glutinous rice balls :P

Have you eaten it today? If not,

GO GO GO EAT! xD

went back to grandmother's house today! so happy (:

_______________________________

Today so happy lehh xD phone kena spam by SCC friends :P

cant wait till Christmas, school reopen and the next SCC :P

i hope there'll be ACC soon :P

_______________________________
so... i have nth to say :P

ciao peeps!

I should be playing in the winter snow, but imma be under the mistletoe (:

Christmas is near! :DDD

Its like 9 more days till Christmas :D

OMG tmrw is Camp ._.

Damn nervous weih.

Hope that i dont do any stupid mistakes and regret it after that ><

Gambateh :D

Im almost ready for camp.

Just need to go Tesco and grab a few more things then im done :D

5 days of camp will be fast, right?

Hopefully it'll pass smoothly. Will be praying (:

the day right after camp,

Will be going to Grandmother's house for reunion :)

Cant wait to go back to see my grandmother. I miss her a lot..

And see my cousins and Aunt as well :D

This December is awesome :D

Thank God for everything <3

in 9 more days will be,

Happy Birthday Jesus and Merry Christmas to all :D

okay i said that too early. ._.

cant wait till 22nd December xD can eat the glutinous ball :D

Especially the homemade ones ^^

Sadly this year i cant make them anymore ):

But im sure that it'll still be tasty since my grandmother makes them ^^

By the way,

Good Morning :D now is 8.10am.

Okay i wanna go play games now.

Ciao. and have a nice day all of you! :D

God will always be there for us (:

Even if im not a Christian, i find this story really touching :')
Actually, God helped me in a lot of things. I just close my eyes to pray and God will be there for me. Im a Buddhist but i still believe God's existence (:

________________________________________

She jumped up as soon as she saw the surgeon come out of the operating room. She said: 'How is my little boy?

Is he going to be all right? When can I see him?'

The surgeon said, 'I'm sorry. We did all we could, but your boy didn't make it.'

Sally said, 'Why do little children get cancer?
Doesn't God care any more? Where were you, God,
when my son needed you?'

The surgeon asked, 'Would you like some time alone with your son? One of the nurses will be out in a few minutes, before he's transported to the university..'

Sally asked the nurse to stay with her while she said goodbye to her son. She ran her fingers lovingly through his thick red curly hair.

'Would you like a lock of his hair?' the nurse asked.

Sally nodded yes. The nurse cut a lock of the boy's hair, put it in a plastic bag and handed it to
Sally.

The mother said, 'It was Jimmy's idea to donate his
body to the University for Study. He said it might help somebody else. 'I said no at first, but Jimmy said, ' Mom , I won't be using it after I die.

Maybe it will help some other
little boy spend one more day with his Mom .'
She went on, 'My Jimmy had a heart of gold.
Always thinking of someone else. Always wanting to help others if he could.'

Sally walked out of Children's Mercy Hospital for the last time, after spending most of the last six months there. She
put the bag with Jimmy's belongings on the seat beside her in the car.

The drive home was difficult. It was even harder to enter the empty house. She carried Jimmy's belongings, and the plastic bag with the lock of
his hair to her son's room.

She started placing the model cars and other personal things
back in his room exactly where he had always kept them.

She lay down across his bed and, hugging his pillow, cried herself to sleep.

It was around midnight when Sally awoke. Lying beside her on the bed was a folded letter. The letter said:
'Dear Mom ,
I know you're going to miss me; but don't think that I will ever forget you, or stop loving you,
just 'cause I'm not around to say 'I Love You'.

I will always love you, Mom ,
even more with each day. Someday we will see each other again. Until then, if you want to adopt a little boy so you won't be so lonely, that's okay with me. He can have my room and old stuff to play with. But, if you decide to get a girl instead, she probably wouldn't like the
same things us boys do. You'll have to buy her dolls and stuff girls like, you know.
Don't be sad thinking about me. This really is a neat place. Grandma and Grandpa met me as soon as I got here and showed me around some, but it will
take a long time to see verything. The angels are so cool. I love to watch them fly. And, you know what? Jesus doesn't look like any of his pictures. Yet, when I saw Him, I knew it was Him. Jesus himself took me to see GOD! And guess what, Mom ? I got to sit on God's knee and talk to Him, like I was somebody important.

That's when I told Him that I wanted to write you a letter, to tell you good bye and everything. But I already knew that wasn't allowed.

Well, you know what Mom ? God handed me some paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter.

I think Gabriel is the name of the angel who is going to drop this letter off to you. God said
for me to give you the answer to one of the questions you asked Him 'where was He when I
needed him?' 'God said He was in the same place with me, as when His son Jesus was on the
cross. He was right there, as He always is with all His children..

Oh, by the way, Mom ,
no one else can see what I've written except you. To everyone else this is just a blank piece of paper. Isn't that cool?

I have to give God His
pen back now He needs it to write some more names in the Book of Life.

Tonight I get to sit at the table with Jesus for supper. I'm sure the food will be great.

Oh, I almost forgot to tell you... I don't hurt any more. The cancer is all gone. I'm glad because
I couldn't stand that pain anymore and God couldn't stand to see me hurt so much, either.
That's when He sent The Angel of Mercy to come get me.

The Angel said I was a Special Delivery!
How about that?

Signed with Love from God, Jesus & Me.

(Let's see Satan stop this one.) Take 60 seconds and repost this, within the hour, you will have caused a multitude of

believers to pray to God for each other. Then sit back and feel the Holy Spirit work in your life for doing what you know God loves 'When you're down to nothing, God is up to something’.'

Im a Trouble Maker.

Trouble Maker- Hyuna & HyunSeung is damn nice. seriously ;)

10 more days till camp. GG.com x_x

Im already half prepared for camp. Just need to buy a few more things then im all ready xD

Camp's gonna be awesome ;)

18 more days till Christmas :DD

I wonder will i get a new phone for Christmas. most probably no. Every year's Christmas is like the same. No gifts for me ): ahaha i dont expect much actually. Camping and going back to my grandmother's house would be my best gift for Christmas <3

25 days till new year :D

this year im gonna countdown at Penang. (: god-cousin's Wedding on the 31st Dec in Penang. My mom's god-brother booked a resort for all the relatives. So this year is gonna be a bit special. at least something new lol ;)

28 days till school reopen!

YESH. FINALLY MORNING SESSION!! cant wait till school reopen weih xD Gonna wear the long pinafore. im gonna miss my short pinafore :/ Next year i wont be able to see all the Form 1s i mean ahem.. Form 2s next year. ._. gonna miss them a lot ):

I sound damn excited for morning session but then i have a feeling that im gonna hate waking up early :P

Okay nothing much now. Baiiii (:

有一种爱情叫做放手.

Christmas is near x3

All i want for Christmas is you By Justin Bieber Ft. Mariah Carey is nice ;)

Mistletoe by Justin Bieber is awesome ^^

I sound like a belieber? ahaha sorry ;) His voice is damn nice now. Mature adi ;)

There's so many things i want for Christmas xD

Im very greedy wan x)

I wan a new phoneee. Blackberry touch, Samsung Galaxy X2 or iPhone 4 pls ;)

Then i wan a webcam. i really need one. ._.

And i wan MORE CREDIT :DDD

I dunno what i wan la.

I just wan a better phone. a phone that can go online. LIKE SRSLY. ._.

_________________________________

I've been really piggy this month.

I keep sleeping and sleeping. hahaha whyy? because i miss my friends too much. the only way to meet them is sleep lorrrhhh. ):

I dream of so many ppl. when i see some ppl i din expect them to be in my dream, when i wake up i'll be like "why are you in my dream? o.o" Especially those ppl i dowanna layan. :P

_________________________________

Those people who takes me as a friend,

Thanks a lot. thanks for being there when i needed you all. even though we're not close, you guys are still there for me. thanks a lot (: I really appreciate it. if you guys need help from me, if i can help, i will (: If you guys need a hug, a shoulder to cry on, someone to share your happiness with, i will always be there. If you need to talk to me, i will be in school or i'll be online. (: dont worry kay? even if the whole world hates you, i will be there standing up with you. (: Thanks for letting me know i have something worth to live over for :)

To those who dislikes me,

Sorry i aint perfect enough for you. Sorry for not acting the way you wan ur friends to be. Im just not qualify to be one of your friends yet i guess. (: its okay. things can work out some how ;) If you need me, i will be there for you no matter what happen. Even though you dislikes me, doesnt mean that you cant talk to me you knw. i dowan you to feel bad or anything. just forget about my existence, okay? its not worth disliking me because that way, you will feel sad and pissed. not good for health yo' (: Thanks for letting me know that there's someone out there better to talk to. (: and im sorry things didnt work out for us.

Kaythanksbaii.

05.12.11; Today i dont feel like doing anything.

YAWN.

I woke up at 1pm. then i eat lunch.

I sleep at 2pm and woke up at 8pm.

HAHAH.

Suddenly black out for few seconds weih -.-

i did nothing much today.

Just sleep :3

Yesterday i watch "Forensic Heroes III" till 4 smth.

then i pack my stuff for camp xD

Just 2 more weeks ><"

HOPE I BOLEH SURVIVE <3

then after packing, i offed my comp and tidur liao.

then today wake up.

nothing to dooooo.

I wanted to check whether is he online but too bad he isnt -.-

He disappeared from my chat list adi o.o

then i wait for my friend to on.

She is on but i dunno what to say.

OKAY IM GETTING LAME.

19 days till Christmas.

24 days till 31 Dec.

25 days till 2012.

Cant wait till 2012 <3

Its gonna be the best year of my life. i Swear ;)

Because nothing is impossible ;)

I finally understand what does "good things needs patience" means. ;)

I didnt sleep for the whole night. why?

Because i wanna talk to my parents.

its been a while since i talked to them.

So until like around 6:45am, i jump out of bed and start warming up my bodyyyy xD

The sky looks so blue and nice. ;) a fresh start. i warm up a little and i dont feel sleepy even until now xD

I talked to my parents about going to Australia to further my studies. (My dream since young :') )

He asked why. Why not New Zealand? (he wanted me to go New Zealand cuz his cousin is there maaa. but i dowan xP)

I said cuz i have friends at Australia.

He said which part? Sydney? Melbourne?

I said Sydney, Melbourne and Goldcoast. ;)

My dad said okay. then my mom was like "you wanna go Australia to further ur studies? OKAYYY!"

omg my parents allowed xD im damn freaking happy! i've been waiting for this day like yearsssss and its gonna come true soooo soon xD

I still have a lot of dreams to fulfill ;)

Im gonna fulfill them slowly. One by One.

PMR 6As, Pelantikan PRS, SPM, Maybe NS, then finally further my studies overseas xD

Slowly fulfill my dreams.

ESPECIALLY theee............. ;)

Cannot say out. later cannot come true. xD ahaha joking la.

Just not telling. sorry to hang you there. :/

gonna update as soon as possible. ciaooo (:

Everyone has failures in life. Who we are, the standards by which we are measured lies in our response to those failures.

Hello World (:

Its been a while since i update my blog (:

I wonder who still reads this xD

Anyways,

I was reading my primary school's School Magazine 2011.

Its soooo nice. reminds me when i was young and dumb.. :P

They have eng translate ._.

I think its becuz most of those graduated schoolmates didnt continue studying chinese thats why they put translation? or izzit the parents wants the translation?

I dont know why..

_________________________________

Okay,

Lets move on to some dramatic stories xD

Its been weeks i havent been talking to him.

Suddenly he talk to me again :D

But then i realized something..

I dont feel excited or happy ._.

Its just felt like an old schoolmate trying to say hi to you after some time..

Is that something good or bad? o.o

____________________________________

I texted that girl to check on her. hahaha

she's fine now. :)

Glad to hear that. now gonna check on another girl.

Dont worry laaa they're just my friends. not enemies or watever. :P

_____________________________________

I.SERIOUSLY.NEED.TO.GO.OUTING.

So lucky all those ppl get to go outing.

not like me. rotting at home ._.

I hope my dad lemme get out of this house for some time.

Except during 17th-21st Dec laa..

5 days away from home xD

Im looking forward to this camp. Flying fox, water activities, obstacle... HAHAHAHA im so gonna have some fun in the hols :D

Wish my parents lemme go sleep over at my grandmother's house.

i freaking miss her ):

______________________________________

Okay end of grandmother story.

Now im texting friends to check on them.

im lifeless :)

CIAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I fell in love with my Best Friend. (Best Friend- Jason Chen)

“我难过时不喜欢说话，我喜欢一个人安安静静的不需要安慰，我喜欢一个人站在窗边望着远处发呆，我喜欢一个人毫无目的的走着，一个人哭泣、一个人擦泪、一个人难过、一个人分担。看到眼前的视线模糊到清晰，清晰后模糊，反复不停。才发现，原来，我一直都只是一个人。”

_______________________________

Hey People ;)

Go listen to the song in my title.

That song is very very nice. Im looking forward to the chinese version xD

Im here updating my blog again.

I find myself really lame and boring. (:

I have nothing better to do, actually.

Since no one is reading this blog, i just spit everything i wanna say xD

andddd, since im SOOOOOO boring,

I will just say wat i planned for next year's first day of school (:

I will bring 5 single line books, blue book and 3 maths exercise books.

I need to buy new pinafore, school shoes, single line books and maths exercise books with the RM100 that the government gave each and everyone of the students.

Good girl huh? NO. my parents wants me to make good use of the money and im kinda forced to use it on school uses. :P

The first day i will be sitting at the pondok infront of dewan.

I dowan go canteen dulu. I wanna meet up with my friends at pondok. :D

Then after a few more days then we decide whether we wanna go canteen :)

I dont like noisy place. unless is Partying ;D

Im going to state camp next month.

Freaking nervous weihhh ><"

Its on the 17th - 21st December.

5 days of torture.

I hope during camp i wont have my period. if not it'll be a big mess.

-__________-

Some ppl ask,

Why i so rajin update my blog?

Not i rajin,

just that i feel like talking but i have no one to talk to so i just talk to my blog.

Is that answer good enough for you?

Haha (:

Have fun during the holidays! :D

xoxo,

Kel.

-no one deserves to be sad or lonely.

there is always someone for you out there,

you just have to find them.

once you found them,

hold on tight because you dont know,

when will they be leaving.

Live your life to the fullest because life is too short to be wasted on.

If you need me, i'll be always online.

Just smile and forget about all the sadness. (:

-Kel.

I don't wanna ruin what we have.

I went 1U today.

went to karaoke.

Wanted to watch "You are the apple of my eye" but that friggin 18sx is just soooo annoying -__________-

Sang so many songs during karaoke session xD

Had a really great time today.

At least i dont have to rot at home.

Went to Hinode shop and bought some stuff ;)

i dont know what to post about today.

Lol.

Oh Oh!

Neway is soooooo worth it!

RM15 for 3 hrs karaoke session, 1 drink, 1 set side meal and free salad buffet is FREAKING WORTH IT! xD

Wanted to drink wine but i showed student card so cant drink T.T

readers, dont drink ya! its bad for your health.

I drink is because of unknown reasons that u wont understand even if i explain

(:

Stay healthy everyone (:

ciao ppl (:

With you right here, everything will be okay.

HELLOOOOO :D

Got my RM100 that was given by the government today :D

Sho happy ^^

i feel like writing novel again la today.

I remember i wrote a novel just for my mom during mother's day last year.

After my mom read it, she said i copy it from somewhere.

Ouch much.

I then continue with a love story. feels like an idiot reading it again. hahaha

I didnt wanna write about family cuz if i do, my mom would say i copied it from somewhere -.-

________________________________

its been 2 days i didnt on facebook chat.

Why? I just wanna quit putting hopes and continue waiting for him to come online. He changed, i know. i can see that. Hahaha.

Im not gonna be sad anymore. I promise myself. No more crying, no more emo-ing. Anything sad just lock it deep down and show that big, valuable smile all the time. I wanna make everyone happier. Even though im gonna sound funny or look funny, its just worth it. I will try all i can to make everyone laugh or at least smile. :)

"If you cant be happy, make someone else happy. By seeing other people happy, you will be happy." (:

陪着我的时候想着她.

OMG blogger blogpost compose change adi ._.

feels so weird.. haha :D

Firstly,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM :D

She's working at home even though its her birthday ._.

Im just sooooo bored. nth to do weih at home.

Hey you guys got ur RM100 adi? :D

Im going to take it tmrw with my brother and my dad. (:

I keep reading my camp schedule weih.

Got 2 times flying fox xD Luckily i din go for firefox which cost 7 coupons :P

Tweeting with Xiao Di now. :)

So boring la at home. but cannot say boring if not my dad will ask me to sweep the floor ._.

Hate doing chores la. if you ask me to do, i wont say anything la. but please la, when im doing, just shut up and dont complain la.

today do what ah?

Keep singing loh.

Nothing to do also.

I sing, eat, sleep when im bored :)

Okay i have nothing to say. CIAO :D

Its okay not to be okay.

“有个人，你一上线就会看他\她在不在，不在就一阵失落，在又不敢打扰；有个人，你总是忍不住去看他\她空间，即使什么新鲜事都没有；有个人，你真的可以无条件付出，他\她却不稀罕；有个人，你那么舍不得，他\她却那么洒脱、不在乎；有个人，你总说要放下他\她，却总忍不住拿来回味。”

"There is this person, when you are online you will notice if he/she is online or not, when he/she is not, you will feel disappointed. When he/she is online, you dont dare to disturb him/her. There’s this person, you always try not to check his/her wall, even though there is nothing new. There is this person, you are willing to put all your effort in, but he/she doesnt mind at all. There is this person, you cant live without but he/she just doesnt care about your existance. There is this person, you wanted to forget about him/her, but you still think back the moments you have when you are with him/her"

My friend posted this as her status. (in chinese)

When i see this status, i keep thinking of him.

I when im online, i will look for him in chat. but then when he is not online, i felt kinda disappointed. when he is, i just dont dare to talk to him because im scared that im disturbing him. so i just keep staring at him online until he went offline without saying a single word.

_____________________________________

I suddenly feel like updating my blog (:

Im pissed at some ppl actually.

And my parents are acting so weird after we moved out.

And they are planning to move again.

Move into BU smth.

when we first moved out, they wan me to go BU2.

I hesitated. But then in the end i din change school.

Now they wan me to change to BU3/BU4.

wat the hell man t(._.t)

Did i ever mention that I HATE DOING CHORES?

My dad's way of not-being-so-pissed is damn funny.

When he is pissed, he ask my bro and i to sweep the floor.

And the worst part is, i have to knw how to do every single kind of chores -.-

Ironing, Sweeping, Wiping, Sewing, Cooking, washing..

Im not your maid la seriously -.-

13.11.11; 我们的约定.

Yesterday was PC2 carnival :D

I went there at 7am with my bro. i wasted 40 mins of my life cuz i have nothing to do -.-

told my dad to fetch me there at 8 but he was too lazy so he ask me to go with my bro.

Things went well after that xD

Around 7:40am, Zhui Lin and Lip Yoong reach school adi.

Then we were talking and Lip Yoong was trolling me :P

After that, Cheih Long came, then Jia Min came.

I saw Zi Yi, Chelsia, Pei Ting, Zhi Xin, Joanna, Vincent, Yi Rou, Carmen, Song Yang and lots more people there today :)

Had a really great talk with Chels (:

Then Pui Ee, Jia Min, Lip Yoong, Zhui Lin, Cheih Long and I went around the whole school playing games.

We went to the Mini Zoo. :D

There's a kangaroo there o.o sorry for the blur pic. too many ppl there :P

Then we took a group photo. :D

those ppl that teman me throughout the whole carnival :D

After that, Xue Ling and Jia Xin came. then we went finding our class teacher, Xie Lao Shi. Sadly, this would be our last group picture together because this year is xie lao shi's last year in PC2 ):

Love you, Xie Lao Shi :D

After the Carnival, we went to 1U. my leg really hurts cuz i din wear heels for 2-3 years and yesterday i wore heels for 10 hrs straight. -.-

Had a really great time at 1U. i went finding Win Shean and Camillia. :)

Then when we're about to leave 1U, Soo Yee was there too ;D

She was working. rajinnyaaa xD

13.11.11 was a really fun day for me :D

Hope that next time 6B can gather again.

Or SMKDU-rians would go out in a gang like this. :)

Ciao ppl :)

Thats what friends are for. ;)

Andrea Kong :)

Thanks for being there for me whenever i needed you. and im glad that im always there for you when u needed someone to talk to. Im sorry that im not as good as ur other friends but i'll try my best to be there for you when u need me :) we went through a lot of ups and downs together. actually, we went through more ups than downs :D we hardly fight. I remember there was once we fight cuz of some misunderstanding but then luckily everything turned out okay. :D Love you! i wont change school cuz I will teman you until we graduate. ;) i dont care what others think about you, or what they think about me. as long as we are best friends, then nothing's gonna come between our friendship. hahahaha sounds like some couples talking to each other. BLEKKK. haha Love you :D

Yong Wen :)

Thanks for being there for me all the time. We went through a lot together. we fight sometimes but we still end up being friends again. :D if one day we cant meet each other, i will always remember you because you will always live in my heart. Let me use chinese la easier for both of us :P
谢谢你一路来的陪伴。可能我们以后不能再见面了，但看着你现在跟我们玩，讲话，讲鬼故事弄得我怕得要命xD, 一起疯，一起淋雨，一起下课，一起饿肚子，一起早去学校.. 你一直以来都对我很好，我却一而再，再而三的令你失望。但我们最终还是很好，很好，很好的好朋友。记得第一天，我们说过我们彼此都找不到能斗嘴却还是在一起的知心朋友吗？我们还约定说我们就做对方的能斗嘴却还是在一起的知心朋友。做做下，还做了几个月呢 :D 我往往比不上你那些从小玩到大的古毛的朋友。他们很了解你，你的心他们永远都看得穿。我却没这个能力。或许是我们认识得还不够久吧？表紧。我们还有一年，两年，三年，一直到永远永远的时间来了解对方。但我能拆穿你哭过来，我觉得已经够了:) 不管以后怎样，你一定要记得和你一起疯过的我们，知道吗？爱你哦！

Nichole :)

家姐，我比较喜欢酱叫你:) 谢谢你这一路来的陪伴。虽然只是短短几个月，但足够让我们的友谊永固了吧？我们很少吵架，但没翻脸过。我记得有一次我惹怒了你，对不起呀，姐！ 谢谢你肯原谅我~我保证不会再有下一次了！谢谢你，我爱你哦 :) 姐，你知不知道，你是第一个做了我那么久的姐姐？谢谢你那么支持我~什么都帮我。姐，我不准你说自己笨，自己没用！在我心中，你就是我最完美的姐姐~ 你很聪明，只是不明显啦！等到有一天，最聪明的人一定是你哦！^^ 姐，谢谢你！我爱你！:)

惠琼，

你也是我的姐姐:) 谢谢你哦！你要坚强，知道吗？不要哭！你还有我们，知道吗？你最喜欢Doraemon啦！xD 我画给你的Doraemon要好好收着哦！祝我们的友谊会永固！加油吧姐姐！:)

The three of us. :)
我们这一gang.

爱，

安家族. :)

Love You You! <3

Because we are awesome like that ;)

This was sang by Yong wen, Nichole,Wei Keng and I :D

Gonna miss all the best moments we had together. :')

This was sang without prepartion.

We're bored. we din go dewan when we are suppose to.

we hide in form 5 block and Yong Wen had an idea so we sang and recorded.

We din wanna show our faces so we use this teddy bear as the main character ;D

Slowly guess which verse is i sing wan la xD

Sorry for the few seconds of waiting in the front.

Technical problem ;)

And the laughing part too. ._. something stupid happened so we started laughing and then we rmb that we are recording so we try very hard not to laugh.

After finish recording this vid, outside form 5 block suddenly got smoke.

so we went out to check and kena caught by Cik Ahni for not going dewan.

we ignored her and we continue walking #likeaboss

Because we're awesome like that ;)

Gonna go KTV with them Next Saturday. will record more songs ;D

Ciao!

the year 2011. -continue

Got back my results yesterday.

wasnt really satisfying. ):

Cuz of sejarah and Science. put so much effort in these 2 subs but still.. -.-

2011 has been a really though year for me to go through.

All the nightmares have ended now.

I can sleep better during the holidays ;D

I got nothing to say actually.

Just hope that all my friends and family will have a better life :D

Okay,

Got to go.

Ciao people :)

the year 2011.

Okay, this is my 3rd post for today. this can prove that how bored am i at home.

This is gonna be a long post. what i've learned in 2011. :)

The year 2011.

Full of ups and downs. Not the best year, not the worst. :)

this year, i've learnt a lot of things.

I've learned to be stronger. everyone have their sad story, im not just the only one that is crying. everyone is. i just have to overcome it, even if im alone. im a lot more stronger compared to last year.

I've learned that, if a friend ditched you, is not cuz they ditch you. is cuz we all have our own life and we have too much friends to accompany. They didnt ditch you, they just have another friend to accompany. they accompanied me for so long, so i have to let others have a chance to have someone to accompany :)

I've learned that, we shouldnt talk bad about other people behind their backs. Just because they talk bad about you, doesnt mean u have to talk bad about them. Honestly, i did talk bad about lots of people behind their backs. Now, i've learned that its something stupid and immature. This is not dedicated to anyone. is just that i dont think gossiping is nice you knw. :) we shouldnt even talk about other people. Everyone have their own way of living in this world. even if its not they way u want them to be, let them be because no one have the rights to control others. be nice to people, talk nice about people. even in return, people talk bad about you behind you, at least u dont feel guilty. :)

I knw a lot of ppl didnt like me. but im trying my best to change and be more of myself.

There is this friend, she was really close to me, used to. but cuz im trying to knw her too much, in the end, she didnt like me. i was sad, obviously. but i knw, one day, she will be my friend again. i just want her to knw, if she is sad, going through a rough time, im always there for her, no matter what happen.

And there is this friend, i backstab her too much last year. but in the end, she forgive me. i was a really bad person last year. now, i've change cuz of her. :) if it isnt for her, i would still be talking bad about other people. hahaha. even now, i knw she dislike talking or even smiling to me, but at least i knw, she still treat me as a friend. thanks :)

My family moved out this year. my grandmother cried for 1 month. i went back to see her every now and then. she still cry whenever she mentioned about my dad. i cried too. i dont have much time left to spend with my grandmother. eventhough my dad still talk bad about her own mother, which is my grandmother, my grandmother still say:

"You have to be a good girl. respect your father. Even though he left without telling me, he is still my son. I wanna see him living a better life. I wanna see him success in his business. if he talks bad about me, its okay. because i knw im not a nice mother."

I cried so badly after hearing that. my grandma also teach me not to talk bad about other people no matter how much you dislike a person.

And for relationships,

I learn to wait. i shouldnt accept someone if i still like another person. full of regrets yo :/ im still waiting for him to come back. im still waiting for him to say he likes me back to. im still waiting. good things needs patience :)

Lemme tell you something funny.

I learn not to trust promises that was made by boys hahahaha xD they wont fulfill it. they will just break it some how. They change too fast. well, not all boys actually. hahahahaha. :)

to be continued. :)

Arguments is what makes the relationship stronger.

Dramatic peoples.

Just dont like it, somehow.

haha just went through a bit of drama with some form 1s.

in the end, everything turned out fine. :)

Well, i dont take sides.

why? cuz its not even my problem.

and both of u are my friends. who should i even side?

-.-

AND,

Facebook is damn lag.

i wonder is it because everyone is online during hols so its very lag,

or is it because the new advertisements at the both sides of facebook.

if its still continue lagging,

Im gonna abandon facebook soon man -.-

Yong wen, Nichole, Wei Keng,

我们永远都是安家族,不离不散的安家族！:D

Andrea,

I love you :D and im wayyy awesome than u kay? HAHAHHAHA! just jokingg. u are awesome too. ;D lets go to AK after hols, kay? love ya :)

Nobody's perfect.

hello peoples :D

i was on the phone with Andrea and Yong wen at the same time just now. haha on loud speaker. xD

Im really scared that i'll lose someone special. its like today we're all best friends but maybe tmrw suddenly everything change. im damn scared. now, i seriously appreciate all my friends that are there for me. i appreciate every single little things.

Thanks Andrea. Thanks Yong wen. :)

and all of u too :)

Im not perfect. nobody is. but some are. look at everyone in those smart class. they are pretty/handsome, smart, good in sports. but for me? haha im just normal. im not good in anything. im not a perfect girl. im just human. i'll get tired hahaha.

Everything's gonna have a bit of changes after this holiday. Im gonna be morning session. Few of my friends are not gonna be in this school. Im not gonna see my form 1 friends if i dont stay back. well, sad life huh?

Im gonna make next year the best year in secondary. my best year in primary was 2009 haha. a lot of ups and downs in 2009 but then it turn out okay. :)

2012.

its gonna be an awesome year. :)

Its the best day ever -Spongebob :D

today is the best day ever mannn :D

It wasnt really great this morning. at first, i woke up to reply my friend's text. then i sleep again and i woke up at 11 ._. i wanted to bath at 9 smth but then i freaking woke up at 11 -.- damn pissed at myself weih.

Then i went to PC2 to buy 3 novels :D my dad let weih xD so happy ^^ then went to school. i went out with Aliya and Nina to buy credit cuz i no credit to reply my friends adi. then i went back to school, i tried calling Andrea but then when i turn back, she's walking towards me. haha stupid me.

Some things didnt went well today. went to Andrea and my place to talk about all the stupid crap that happened :D we played a stupid game but still fun ;D gonna miss her like siao mannn ):

I GOT A TEDDY BEAR FROM NICHOLE :DD

so happy xD

i hide in F5 block with Yong Wen, Nichole and Wei Keng today :D so fun. camwhoring all the wayyy xD then we sang and recorded it. so funny xDD the recorded sound damn funny la. real vocal damn nice mannn :P

then got smoke come out from the field so we went out and see but end up we kena from Cik Ahni for not going to dewan -.-

Talked to Su Ling, Yvqueen, Aliya, Nina, Divya, Jia You and Jeremy in dewan. well, watching presentations by form 1s is not really exciting and not boring lol. hahahaha im stupid (:

after school, i texted all my friends saying happy holidays. :D im gonna miss all my form 1 friends mann ): next year im going morning session adi! FINALLY MANNN.

but sadly i wont get to see him anymore. ): was waiting to go form 3 just to see him everyday but where he go? ): haih nvm. can listen to my form 3 (form 4 next year ;D ) friend's stories ahahaha xD so many story not yet listen finish weih xD but most probably i'll be studying for PMR x.x

Next year, PMR year. I GG.COM DULU :D

2012 is gonna be the best year of my secondary life. :)

Happy Holidays! I love you! im gonna miss everyone of you. im gonna miss seeing you all everyday.

To people that loves me, thanks for being there for me whenever im down. thanks for everything you all done for me. i knw we mmg will fight sometimes but then u all still love me HAHAHA thanks a lot! really appreciate it :D happy holidays yeahhh! ^^

To those who hates me, thanks for making me stronger. i never knew whats gonna be worse than u guys talking bad about me behind my back. but still, thanks for being my friends before being my haters. haha happy holidays to you guys :)

Just because im smiling doesnt mean that im happy.

Hello Peoples :D

Im being very bad these days.

i ponteng the whole day ._.

This morning was DA BOMB mann xD

I had so much fun with all the form 3s (:

My form 3 friend came to accompany me since im alone. yes im #foreveralone.

Woon Seng told me about his "history" and ze xian too (:

interesting xD until Pn Shama and that dude HAVE to interrupt -_________-

i hate people interrupting my conversations -.-

Today i learnt something (: something i will never learn anywhere else. i cared a lot for this friend, but this friend doesnt seems to care at all. i knw that this friend aint gonna care about me at all, so whats the point of me caring so much? haha. im not being nice anymore. (lol since when im nice? i was never nice. -.-)

yes, i shouldnt talk to u. i shouldnt be the one who always go to u instead of u coming to me. i shouldnt even knw u in the first place. i shouldnt have told u why was i sad and i shouldnt cheer u up when u were sad. haha i feel so stupid :)

ANYWAYS,

today was a rough day for Andrea and I. we went to our place and started crying and talking about whats going on. i din actually cried but yeah. a lot of things was happening these days and its the last few days of school. ):

haha should stop all these stupid dramas. im gonna die soon somehow, hahaha. (:

"just live ur life to the fullest as long as u are alive" (:

ciao :D

想要飞呀飞，却飞也飞不高.

Today was a very very very fun day :D

firstly,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WONG ZHI YIN ;D

okay continue.

today i woke up at 11. i dunno why i feel so dizzy in the morning at 9 so i continued sleeping till 11. i woke up, brushed my teeth then go bath.

Then right after my bath, my bro walk me to centrepoint McD for 1 hr early ._.

i was alone in McD for 1 Hr. i regret not bringing my sejarah form 3 book there weih. -.- i hate myself -.-

i stoned there thinking "should i go home? or should i stay? should i text that guy? or should i text that girl? should i call her? or should i call her?"

i wasted 1 hr of my life.

then Zhui Lin came :D

She gave me a box printed with Teddy bear :D sho cute ^^ THANKS ZHUI :D 9 yrs and still couting :)

Then Xue Ling came :D we went Centrepoint walk around. then i wanted to buy the science book with all the pass year papers. then Xue Ling didnt wan me to pay ): she paid for me instead cuz she feel paiseh for not buying present for me.. actually, u teman me for today is the best present adi la :D

Then Zhui requested to go 1U. but i scared cuz i dunno how to walk out of 1U for 2 times ._. so im really scared to go 1U. plus my parents dun like me to change location or extending time. so i said dowan.. then she say wanna go TC, so i called my dad but then he din pick up. so i called my mom. she say okay :D

Then Zhui, Xue Ling, Zhen (Zhui's bro) and I went TC together :D wanted to watch movie but i said dowan cuz if spend time on movie is not worth it. so we decided to walk the whole TC mall instead xD

I bought 2 disc which is Love You You and Nasi Lemak 2.0 (: finish watching adi lo :P

I din cry while watching Masi Lemak 2.0 cuz nth touching also LOL. i cried during watching Love You You. so touching :'(

Atleast in the movie, the boy and the girl are together in the end. when the girl shouted the boy's name, reminds me of... him ._. i suddenly miss him so much and i burst into tears and keep crying. hahahaha dramatic much?

Sorry Adrian. i din keep my promise of not watching drama and dont cry. i watch a movie and cried again :') so i broke half of it only :P i din watch drama. movie je ^^

Today was a very fun day for me. i din feel stress talking to my friends today (: we talked about the school's people and realize that our school have same kind of people. Those kind of people that are kind and nice of course (: glad to have em in every school! ^^

i bought Chocolate for Zhui, Xue Ling and Zhen. they dowan lemme spend so i paiseh and i belanja them chocolate :D then i went home. Zhui's dad sent me home. thanks uncle (: today was fun. im gonna start on the science book that i receive as a gift from xue ling later or tmrw ^^

got to go now.

will be updating soon (:

That should be me holding your hand.

Olla peeps :) sorry for not updating so much. cuz of finals ):

Woke up at 6am this morning. i brought my phone with me today.

then i went to grandmother's house. ate breakfast and lunch there :D

reloaded my phone ^^ then i started texting my friends, then call my primary school friend since i missed her call ._.

Talked to my primary class teacher. SHOOOO HAPPY xD

Finally fourteen today :)

I went to School at around 1:30pm. Ngam ngam Andrea came at the same time :D we went to Bang Bang, Sin Yoon Seng and Chatime. she bought my present infront of me make me damn paiseh weih ._.

KONG! i ask u treat today as a normal day lohhh :P Thanks btw! xD

btw, My results are all screwed up ):

Geo-63

Sej-57

KH- 51 (havent add formative)

BM- 59 (havent add formative)

BI- paper 1 + 44 (paper 2)

Seni- 40/40

Sivik- 78

Moral- 69

BC- 74

Maths- 74

Science- unknown

Dammit weih so far average only 68.2% (Sivik, Geo, Sej, Maths and Moral)

hope it stays there weih T.T

PLEASE MANN. A for one subject. just one ):

Thanks to ppl that wished me today (:

-Andrea

-Adrian Wong

-Yong Wen

-Jia Yuin

-Su Ling

-Yv queen

-Marcus Lee

-Win Shean

-Divya

-Serena

-Poh Leanne

-Xiao Qi

-Vi Nie

-Nichole

-Wei Keng

-Si Chian

-Yang Ler

-Hareen

-Niki

-Samantha

-Elaine

and everyone of u i din state out :P

ur wish means a lot to me (:

BTW,

I GOT WIN SHEAN'S SPBT BOOKS FOR NEXT YEAR :DDDD

hahaha :D

Thanks for texting with me today Shean and Marcus :)

Really appreciate it :)

Thanks! ^^

what i do to have you here..

OLLA PEEPS.

Im studying now. -___-

Updating my blog with a short post.

Geo is fun :D but all the banjaran and empangan is not fun ._.

im gonna study form 1 geo, sejarah, science and KH.

then im gonna memorize my Nilai and pengajaran for BM,

then gonna go read my Boscombe valley mystery notes.

Form 2 is fun.

the exams are fun compared to form 1s.

HAHAHA im going crazy.

DID I JUST SAY EXAM IS FUN? :O

okay I AM CRAZY.

actually, nope.

i cant wait till after exams.

Good luck in ur exams too! :D

Vin, Andrea, Steff, Jia Yuin, Jazlynn, Yong Wen, Nichole, Wei Keng, Nina, Aliya, Divya, Jessica, Esther, Jian Wei, Zhi Cong, Miki, Batrisyia, Niki, Samantha, Javier, Kian Yang, Ben, Poh Leanne, Jia You, Yvqueen, Su Ling and every one of u that i din mention :P

CIAO :)

Tomorrow will be a better day ;)

Hey peeps! Hows life so far? ;D

Hope you guys enjoying life now ^^

I woke up at 10:55am today. slept at 12:30am yesterday but cant manage to wake up early ): I had my lunch adi ;D Wantan Mee. Bought it from hawker stall in Centrepoint since my house near centrepoint. the noodles are nice, but i still prefer kimwah's wan.

Why must we move out in the first place? -_________-

Today will be a wonderful day to study i think :P just joking.

I give up on my studies. Im not gonna Ace anything. 65% for every subjects is my aim. (:

Im gonna study bit by bit. Finals is here.

it wont be killing me unless i let it ;)

I've prepared to go for last class next year xD

Following my bro's foot steps :P

PMR aint gonna pull us down <3

Ciao Blogsters ;)

Will be updating soon. (:

准备好了3,2,1, Im always Online.

I want finals to end soon! :D i know im not gonna Ace anything, but i can still be in SMKDU is enough. :')

Next Year would be my PMR year. but its gonna be fun right? ;D

next year, im gonna miss all my favorite little juniors like Nina, Divya, YvQueen, Su Ling, Aliya, Poh Leanne, Jia You, Rachel and more.. im so gonna stay back to see them! :D every friday try finding time to go out with them ;)

Next year, im gonna be someone nicer. i'll be more serious on my studies, be more mature and less dramatic. i should change the way i treat things :P im being too over reacting sometimes. :P

Im gonna go recess with Andrea :D but if she wanna hang with her gang, then i shall hide myself in the library then :) except for the few days when library is not open -________-

Im gonna stop all the dramas between my friends and I. we're friends and nothings gonna break it. :)

Next Year Form 3 and Form 4 recess together. so.. Library is gonna be packed? i hope not ^^

Im not eating. Im gonna save up my money for going out with my friends ;D

Next year, i will continue St. John, Chinese Club and Basketball but this time im gonna join PRS ;D im just worried if i cant get it. it'll make me damn disappointed.

I'll see if theres any other Koko i can join.

Next Year, I have to attend for tuition already. my mom force me to. ): but its okay. :D before tuition, im gonna go visit my grandmother :D then i'll walk alone to Uptown for tuition。 #foreveralone :')

I like using the hash tag #foreveralone xD cuz im awesome like that ;) I hope i can remain in Kiambang or go to Dahlia or Cempaka. its cuz of the studies je (:

Im gonna pay 120% attention to what teacher's gonna teach like how i did this year xD

the things im not gonna change is my friends :P im never gonna change them. ;)

Im planning for next year adi. ahahaha. (:

2012, its gonna be a awesome year for me.

Cheers!

Hey Babeh, i think i wanna marry you.

OKAY OKAY RANDOM TITLE :P

Good morning :D

Im not gonna post dramatic stuff anymore :P i've been too dramatic in the 2 previous post. im gonna post about my daily life ;D

Today is deepavali. ._. i woke up at around 7am, and i was bored so i went back to sleep since yesterday i slept at 1am :)

Then i woke up at 9:30am, on the comp and start to check fb and twitter xD

I mmg lifeless (: i dunno what to post la actually.

i dowanna talk about finals. its gonna be my worst nightmare ._.

im bored. like seriously.. i havent eat my breakfast yet ):

Im gonna go get smth to eat now ^^

Ciao Blogsters <3

And when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while.

i realize a lot of my friends are secretly reading my blog without telling me.

Makes me feel so touched :')

Today wasnt a productive day for me. ):

i dont know why but its quite hard to concentrate nowadays. so i just online :P sowwie. im a playful girl and i gotta admit that :D

I try not to post emo things. unless i really cant take it :P need to learn how to control yo!

I called Andrea and talk to her bout some stuff. i felt so much better after that :) Thanks Andrea! :D

Im scared and excited for finals. :P Scared is cuz its gonna set which class im going next year. Excited is cuz i have a bit confidence for Sejarah, Science, Geo and maths :P

For BM, BI, KH, Seni Paper 1, Sivik, hahaha i gg.com. my moral adi gg. got 69. cried cuz of that. ): i was expecting 75. T.T but its okay, i dowan get adi get loh. how?

sorry for my broken english. thats me :D im lame, and cinapek. i have to admit that ._.

I drank Chicken essence. the taste damn... ._. i dont know how to describe it. its like drinking water, then after that got a kind of strong chicken smell then when it flows down my throat it taste so.. empty._.

sorry for my bad explanation. Bad at explaining yo! :DD

Have to learn my grammar adi la. cannot stay like this :P look on the bright side, my bm is worse than my english :P

Im gonna go back to my primary school on 4 Nov for children's day >:D gonna gobble up all the children's food! xD just joking. i dont eat much.. or do i? :P im just gonna go find my gang that i didnt meet for ages xD and all my primary school teachers ;D

I miss my gang <3 hopefully i can go back man. i still can recall what happen last year. its a total disappointment mannn! all thanks to my dad. -____-

oh oh oh! guess what?

i dunno what to say. :/

LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAME :)

Ciao!

Its either everyone is my friend, or everyone is my best friend.

This song is awesome <3 JJ Lin's voice is dayum nice ^^

This time, im gonna either pass with low marks or fail. But hopefully EVERY subject get AT LEAST 65%. hopefully weihhh.

if i get 65% for every subjects, then i get 65% for average, which is a very nice thing. (: 1. i wont get kick out of school, 2. i will remain in Kiambang. :P

Dear someone,

i cant go 1U now and i choose not to cuz finals is coming and i have to study. please dont get pissed at me just cuz i cant go 1U with you.

Sincerely,

Me.

can this day get any worse? (its a question, not a challenge.)

Im just freaking piss off at my dad now.

this will be a long post of MY INNER SELF. if you wanna say ANYTHING about me, saying im LOA, pathetic, whatever, PLEASE LEAVE BEFORE I GET PISSED AT YOU. this is MY family problem and i have NO ONE to tell to, okay?!

i've been reading other people blog saying how bad their dad are and i know how they freaking feel. at least they will have a sister or a mom there for them. BUT WHAT DO I HAVE? both parents are treating me like im the maid in this house.

im sorry for posting this. i just cant take it. seriously. why? cuz i've been holding this since std 3. the day you said you wanna send me away! DAD! im ur freaking daughter. YOUR ONE AND ONLY daughter.

when we go out for dinner with your pathetic uncles and friends, and ppl started complimenting about me for being the only daughter, and saying that i can manja whenever i want, I FREAKING WANNA POINT A MIDDLE FINGER.

even though im the only daughter, IT DOESNT MEAN I GET ANY BENEFITS. the chores, i always do double. every week, i risk my hands for getting burned by the iron. but what do i get? not a thank you but i have to wash the dishes, WIPE the floor using just 1 PIECE OF CLOTH, sweep the floor every week!

the studies, i MUST be the best among all my siblings. WHAT GIVES? my younger brother's academics are better than mine. im not smart! i never said i am. and even though how much effort i put into my studies, I WILL NEVER ACE MY EXAMS. why? BECAUSE IM NOT SMART OKAY?!

i really wanna shout at my parents. calling me a sohai and a bitch INFRONT OF ME. and its not even my fault okay? your fucking favourite beloved little son, A FUCKING BRAINLESS 4 YEARS OLD, throw candy ALL OVER THE FLOOR and started smashing it by using toys, i was shouting at him and then gor gor help to clean it up! i din ask him to okay?! and then when mom started to say "ur little brother giving you job again?" to my bro, then dad started saying "what ur little bro? this sohai give jobs wan la" WHAT THE EFF MAN. and mom started to say "always blame ur little brother"

WHAT GIVES MAN. i din even blame ur favourite little son! am i the one who throw candy all over the floor? AM I?! if its me, i wouldve cleaned it all up, BY MYSELF. no one in this house would ever help me. NO ONE. including my elder bro. he might help me sometimes but when i really need him, he would ask me to do everything MYSELF. im the only girl, and its lonely enough already. why wanna give me so much troubles and let me face it myself?

im not a boy and everyone in my relatives will ALWAYS side my bro. including my favourite aunt. i always know that everyone is siding my bro. NO POINT coming forward to me and say "actually, i love you as much as i love your bro" IT DOESNT HELP OKAY. if you really mean it, PROVE IT. when my bro needs money, YOU FREAKING GAVE HIM RM50! when i need money? u ask me to earn it myself. ya, being the only girl SUCKS.

I really wanna disappear from this house, this family. its seriously unfair to me. my brothers need money, you guys trust them and give them MORE THAN ENOUGH. when i need money? you guys DONT trust me at all. say that im cheating your money. EVEN if i hand in the notice swaying i need this much amount of money. i just dont have the rights to talk. I HAVE to do everything myself.

all my friends in my school have awesome lifes with their parents. not all, actually. some have family problem worse than mine. i have to face everything myself. thanks to my mom's sister saying she wanna send her OWN mother to the old folks home, making me worrying about not seeing my grandma anymore. and thanks to my dad for having fights with his own mother, which is also my grandma. no matter how much my grandma put effort in doing things, NOBODY APPRECIATES. i've made my promise. if i grow up and earn money, i will take care of my OWN grandparents. but then sadly both side of my grandfather passed away. i WILL take care of my grandmothers.

NO ONE appreciates what i do. no one cares about me. even my friends. they have their own problems, i have to be their listener. but when it comes to my problems, THEY JUST WOULDNT LISTEN. im a loner. im forever alone. no one understands about me. not even a single bit. when they say they understands me, i will just nod my head and smile. im not dedicating this post to any of my friends. im just being over reacting thats all. i just feel lonely and i wanna have friends to cover up my sadness of being lonely BUT WHEN THIS HAPPENS, people say im LOA, fitting in or smth. im just lonely. i already have this kind of family, and i have to face these kinds of friends. THE WORST PART IS, when i start talking to boys cuz they are less dramatic, people started teasing the boy. it makes me feel so bad, so i just stop talking to that boy. and then, i'll become lonely again.

SERIOUSLY? you wan me to state out THAT ONE friend that i can go through anything with? no one comes into my mind. i have no one with me. im facing everything alone. why is all this happening to me? i have to face depressions alone. i have to face troubles alone. i admit im a trouble maker. i admit im not a good girl. i admit im not those kind of girl that everyone adores. im not the happy kind of people. i have feelings too. but in school, i just have to SMILE, laugh or sometimes just be a hardcore. NO ONE CARES. my haters care. they always watch every wrong moves of mine and started talking about it.

im just tired of all this shits that everyone is giving me, okay? MOM AND DAD, dont ever compare me to those africans. even though they starve, they die, they are poor, BUT THEY HAVE A PERFECT FAMILY BEFORE THEY DIE. their family goes through this whole pain with them. eventhough its just a short time they spend together, they still spend it happily. sometimes i've been wondering, why us, average people, cant live as happy as those poor people?

Im being pathetic. fuck my life.

以为你什么都懂,原来只是我以为..

恭喜我。

我得了恋爱恐惧症，以及轻微忧郁症.

我怕恋爱。也害怕受伤。

我想单身。而且要单身很久的那种。

我已经不想再为“爱” 这个消遣的东西弄伤了.

够了。我不想再疯了。

我要学会坚强，

学会独自面对一切！

我要变得更爱自己，

更独立，更坚强。

我不要再低头了！

我要勇敢的面对一切。

我对自己许下承诺，

我一定要做到。

一定要..

emo all over again. :')

Nowadays,

im emo again.

Why?

I should stop being emo and have lots more fun before my life ends ._.

Its okay,

I still can face everything alone.alone..alone...

Yes, Alone.

Im always alone.

Im forever alone :')

Nvm, i got to go anyways. bye (':

im not happy now. i wanna cry it all out. but its hard. cuz i dont know how to express my feelings through crying. i tried smiling, but the sad feeling is still there..

you.. yes you ): whyyy? T.T

but sometimes..

All i need is just a hug from you. but i'll never get it,

anymore.

Its just not worth it.

Whats wrong with me? you really wanna knw?

Im tired. im tired of all the dramas. im tired of caring for friends that never cared for me. im tired of starting a conversation, trying to keep it alive by saying random things but you just dont bother to put an effort to keep it alive. im tired of missing someone so much, they dont even care. im tired of talking on the phone. im tired of talking to people that thinks im fitting in. im tired of studying, even though i already know how much i study i still wont ace my academics. im tired of holding on to something that will never be mine. im tired of comforting other people but when i need comforting no one cares. im tired of life. im tired of myself being so tired. i tried to be nice to people but no one cares or bothers.

im trying to be nice to people but no one appreciates. im trying to talk and be more socialize but im just causing unwanted troubles. if i do things right, people never come to me and say "great job!" but when i do something wrong, "what the eff is wrong with you?" and start talking about me behind my back.

im just pissed at all this crap. i tried my best to live as someone i would love to live as. i dowanna care for a hardcore person. i dowanna study for nothing. i dowanna be like this. i dowanna be emo. im seriously out of all this shits. when people dont come to me, i wont go to people. i tried to be more caring, asking people are they okay, but in return, people call me lifeless because i cared too much. ya, im lifeless, im an unwanted bitch, im a pedo, im a cougar. call me whatever you want because im just too tired of caring. even if i shut you up, the next person will start talking about me. i dont care anymore. no matter how much i try, nothing will work as i wished.

im seriously pissed at myself. i try talking but people think im fitting in. i tried smiling but people makes me pissed. i tried caring but people call me lifeless. SO WHAT SHOULD I DO? now im gonna sit at my dark corner and start drawing circles and think that everything is my fault. i should cry alone in the dark and start smiling to people.i hate it whenever i cry, people will call me attention seeker. im just sad, okay? i dont need ur freaking attention. i dont hold my tears. i dont know how to. even if i hold back my tears, i still dont know how to smile. no one ever come to me and start saying "i'll be there for you no matter what happens" NO ONE will ever say that to me.

dont think i dont know what you guys are calling me behind my back. wan me to list them out? sure. here you go. : slut, bitch, pathetic whore, pedo, cougar, drama queen, attention seeker, trying to fit in, trying to be popular, useless bitch. why? because, I DIN DO ANYTHING TO YOU BUT U JUST JUDGE ME WITHOUT KNOWING THE WHOLE EFFING STORY AND YOU HATE ME LIKE THAT. but its okay. i dont care. this is karma. karma is being a bitch to me. everything is being a bitch to me. YOU, are also being a bitch to me. i just hate all this. i wanna tell someone about my problems but no one will ever listen.

and guess what?

AFTER I POST THIS, PEOPLE WILL CALL ME ATTENTION SEEKER. TRUST ME, IT'LL HAPPEN.

fml.

we'll be alright.

In my previous post, the story was interesting kan? my friend wrote it ^^ her name is Michelle Siew Wei Keng :D this is the second part.

我们开始想我们的名字。当我们想到头脑要爆炸的时候，我的妹妹---凯丽却想到了一个好主意。他说不如我们全部人就姓安吧！！！凯丽想到的这个主意蛮不错的，那时我们的头脑就像有个电泡着亮了。我们想到了各自的名字，泳雯就是(安子熙)，维芯(安唯末)，淑玲(安紫颜)，凯丽(安紫韵)和我(安小涵)。然后，就开始想我们的样子。我们一致确定用TVB女生的样子来作为我们的新样子，泳雯(廖碧兒)，维芯(杨怡)，淑玲(钟嘉欣)，凯丽(陳法拉)和我(佘詩曼)。我们写好了就给博士。

博士就帮我们换上了他们的样子。首先，我们都确的怪怪的，不过久而久之就习惯了。过后，博士就帮我们打针，这支针不是普通的针，博士说打了这支针我们的力量会变大。不过，我们打了这支针很不舒服似的，但是博士说是这样的。有一个晚上，我和姐妹们觉得很闷，一边讲话一边听歌，也不知不觉的经过博士的实验室，看到博士在插支针在一个僵尸的手上，我们觉得怪怪的就冲进去。博士看到这样的情况也喃喃自语的说：“也瞒不了多久”。我和维芯看到不对劲，就拿起身边的小刀子想博士哪指去还一口同声的说：“你在讲什么”。博士说：“我不是有心瞒你们的”。

在我们的‘严刑逼供’下，他终於说出真相了。。。。。(到底是什么真相呢？？？下回在继续吧！！！)

i translate it again :)

We began to think of our names. When we think till our mind is going to explode, my sister --- Kelly has thought a good idea. She said that our surname will be put as "An"! ! ! Kelly's idea was very good, then suddenly we all had an idea.We named ourselves as: Yong Wen is (An Zi Xi), the Wei Xin (An Wei Mo), Shu-Ling (AnZi Yan), Kelly (An Zi Yun) and I (An Xiao han). Then, we begin to think of how we should look. We agreed on a set like girls with TVB as our new look, Yong Wen (Bernice Liu ), Wei Xin (Yang Yi), Shu-Ling (Linda Chung), Kelly (Fala Chen) and I (Charmaine Sheh). After we finish writing our names and looks, we hand it to the Ph.D.

the Ph.D. put on their looks for us. First, we felt a little strange and uncomfortable of our looks, but after a while, we got used to it. After that, the Ph.D. gave us injections. This jab is not an ordinary Jab, the Ph.D said after we intake this jab, we will be more stronger physically. However, we feel very uncomfortable after the jab, but Dr. said its meant to be like this. One night, my sisters and I felt bored. so we were talking and listening to songs, but also unknowingly we passed-by the laboratory of Ph.D. and saw the Ph. Dr. inserted needles in the hands of a zombie, we feel weird about it ran inside. Seeing this situation, Ph. Dr. muttered, said: "also can not conceal how long." Wei Xin and I sense something is wrong , then we took a small knife and pointed against the Ph.D and asked: "What did you just say?." Dr. said: "I didnt mean to lie to you."

by using our 'torturing way', he finally tell us the truth. . . . .

(what will be the truth in the end??? Continue it next time!!!)

dont you find this story interesting? haha see you soon (:

听你说，听你说，我们同时拥有一个真心的朋友.

my friend told me a weird and realistic dream of hers. i wanna share it cuz i find it real cute xD

"嗨，不知道是梦还是什么呢？？？每天都在幻想着如果，明年真的有世界末日的话。。我们会怎样呢！！！不过，我确的怪怪的。。我每天都在幻想着，应该不会发梦的吧！！难道这是所谓的‘日有所思，夜有所梦’。我梦见到，我们没有死而被一个博士救了，带我们到另外一个星球----火星。还帮我们建立了一个完美的世界，就像以前一样。不过，有一个条件，那就是他要所有在读着书的同学帮他的忙。

在这段期间，我们接受不同的挑战，他要我们做成一位文武双全的人。他说会选那一位比较厉害，帮他做事。已经到了比赛那一天，我看到全部人都很怕。我看到一个又一个，一个又一个 ，终於到我了，我也很怕偶。。我跟那个同学打到你死我活我的。我看到了那个同学很辛苦的，所以我给他赢了。。我的好姐妹凯丽看到我这样就过来安慰我。。我就跟他说：其实我是给他赢的，我看到他那么辛苦。结果，我所说的话，给博士听到了。博士很欣赏我，也说我的文武很好，可以帮他做事，还要认我为干女。还说那个女生不要帮博士。

能够帮到博士的只有五位，永雯(我的姐姐)，淑玲(我的家姐)，薇芯(我的阿姐)，凯丽(我的妹妹)还有我。博士说去帮他做事要用其他的名字偶。。。"

Lemme translate it using google translate.. i edited some :)

"Hey, i do not know whether is this a dream or what? ? ? i everyday imagine that, if next year is really the end of the world. . What will we do! ! ! However, I felt weird. . I imagined it every day, im not suppose to be dreaming of it! ! Is this so-called 'thinking of it in the day, dreaming of it in the night'. I dreamed that we didnt die but a Ph.D. saved us instead, and took us to another planet ---- Mars. He also helped us set up a perfect world, just as before. However, there is one condition, that is, every students that are studying now have to help him.

During this period, we have to accept different challenges, he wants us to be a civil and military people. He said he would choose that one that is more powerful, to help him do things. and it has come to the game that day, I saw all the people are very afraid. I saw one after another, one after another, and finally my turn, and I was afraid too. the student and I were competing really hard. I saw that the student fighting very hard, so I let her win. . I see my good sister Kelly came over to comfort me so. . I told him: In fact, I let her win, and I see her fighting for it so hard. As result, I have said, to hear Dr..Dr. appreciate me, said my good civil and military, can help him do things, but also recognize me as god -daughter. Dr. said that the other girl do not need to help.

there's only five people that can help the Ph.D. , which are Yong Wen (my older sister), Shu-Ling (my older sister), Wei-pin (my sister), Kelly (my younger sister) and me. we need to use other names to help the Ph.D."

our different names will be:

安子熙- An Zi xi (Yong Wen)

安小涵- An Xiao Han (Wei Keng)

安紫韵- An Zi Yun (me, Kelly)

安紫颜- An Zi Yan (Nichole)

安唯末- An Wei Mo (Wei Xin)

haha! i wonder will this ever come true :P

if its the end of the world next year, i would really go to Mars with ^ them :D

love ya!